There is a little thing Steve does for me each Valentine's Day. The first year he did this (he was on his mission) I thought it was not only the most adorable thing ever, but I also thought he was genius, mostly because he had his Valentine's Day's set for the rest of forever:) I know I've told this story before, but Freshman Year he wrote me a song for Valentine's Day and the last line of the song was something like "here is my Valentine Review, here's my heart, here's to you." The next year I was so excited when I received Valentine Review Volume I in the mail the day before Valentine's Day. Anyway, I'm telling this story because part of Volume I was Steve's side of the first kiss on September 21st. Since I told my side of the first night we met, I thought I'd share his side of this story, which is always more exciting anyway:)
It was a Wednesday night, which meant semi-weekly visiting hours in Helaman Halls. It was also the season premiere of "Lost", which I was pretty excited about. Anyway, on that wonderful Wednesday, Audrey decided to come over and see Justin, Daniel and I. Not that I noticed. My eyes were glued to the television. Soon thereafter, somewhere in the middle of the episode, Moffat, Brubaker and yourself came over. Of course, the television was still on, so I was not very social, but we all sat in Justin's room, while you, Justin, Daniel and the girls talked, I yelled at everyone to shut up so I could hear what was going on. Well, the chaos ended with Audrey going home and you and the girls heading back to Heritage Halls. However, as fate would have it, Brubaker left her book (some strange medieval times book) in Justin's room! Obviously, that would mean that somebody would have to come and get it. Hence, an hour or so later, who should show back up in the May Hall lobby, but Rachel Moffat and Jessie Pollei, looking for some queer book about knights. Anyway, you and I ended up on the couch next to each other (the love seat size, not the big one), with me on the left of course (in your good ear) and we hung out with an array of people -- just whoever happened to walk by and decide to sit down. We were having fun and you and I were flirting like 12-year-olds as usual. After about an hour, Moffat decided to leave. You tried to go with her, but she refused. After several minutes of hushed and hurried conversation outside, you returned and announced that Rachel would walk home alone and you returned to your spot next to me on the couch. We talked some more and flirted a lot. Different friends came in and out, but we remained constant. The majority of my floor knew that I liked you and that I was debating how to make the first move, so they were more than happy to "help" by not-so-sneakily walking by while brandishing a bottle of Martinelli's sparkling cider. (For those who don't know: on Steve's hall freshman year, if a boy kissed a girl they would celebrate once he came back to the hall by drinking Martinelli's and hearing the story.) I was slightly embarrassed, but I (wrongly) assumed you didn't know what it meant. Anyway, after some time and much internal struggle, I finally plucked up the courage to do something I had wanted to do for eleven days: I reached over and (stealthily and smoothly, of course) grabbed your hand. You looked at me and smiled and I don't remember what I said and don't know what kind of look I gave you, but I can only hope I didn't look or sound like a complete doofus, because I was nervous! I had a circus of butterflies in my stomach and I was in completely uncharted waters. Sure, I'd had high school girlfriends, but this was different: those were strictly physical attractions, this was something more. Despite my nervousness and probable awkwardness, you didn't reject me. Your smile was a welcome sign of approval and sent my spirits soaring (as it still does to this day). We sat there for quite awhile longer, talking to friends and holding hands. I was on Cloud Nine. My friends took note of our newfound public display of affection, and the Martinelli's brandishing became more frequent: the pressure was on. Of course, I wanted to kiss you, but I didn't want to risk pushing it too far and going too fast; I didn't want to damage anything that we potentially had going for us. And hence, the battle in my head began. As we left May Hall and I walked you home, the war was raging: should I kiss her, or should I wait? By the time we reached F. Smith Hall, I was still torn. I wanted to kiss you, but naturally, I was nervous and did not want to move too fast. As we sat down on the steps to talk, I still had no earthly idea what I was going to do. As we were talking (I have no recollection of what we talked about -- I was so nervous!), I kept trying to strike up the courage to just do it: to follow my heart instead of my head. I kept looking for an opportunity, for the perfect juncture where you would look at me and I would look back at you and then it would just happen. I waited. And we kept talking. And I waited some more. Then, all at once, it happened: the moment I had been looking for! I don't know what we were talking about, but somewhere past midnight, the conversation hit a lull and you looked over at me and I was staring right back at you. Our eyes met and, just as I had hoped and (to be quite honest) dreamed, I leaned over and, ignoring the butterfly circus doing cartwheels in my stomach, kissed you. ... I don't remember what was said, just like I don't remember much of what was said the rest of the night; maybe you do. However, while I may not remember the exact words I uttered on that momentous occasion, I do recall exactly how I felt: happy. Pure ecstasy. There have been few times in my life where I have been as happy as I was in the early hours of September 21st ... As we parted with one last kiss for the evening and I left to return home, I literally skipped all the way back to May Hall. If I was on Cloud Nine before, I was actually on Cloud Ten or Eleven. I had kissed Jessie Pollei. I had actually found the courage to follow my heart and it had led me straight to you. And in that moment, everything in the world was right. Sure, there was the unabashed male chauvinism of the Martinell's ceremony back at the dorm, but that night was special and I knew it as soon soon as my lips touched yours. My entire world changed in that one moment on September 21st 2005...
Tonight when I got home from work around 6 p.m., Steve surprised me with flowers and was making dinner! We ate then decided to go to Park City for the evening. We went to the outlets and came across a few good finds. Then we came home, and now I'm blogging while Steve is playing his PS3 College Football game (his anniversary gift). It has been a wonderful day together!! Here's to year five...:)
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